It’s come to my attention that I will never make the kind of money necessary to actually pretend to be a dressage rider, so I’m going to embrace my economically depressed roots!
Here’s a partial check list for how to tell if you’re too poor to be a dressage diva (feel free to add more):
- Your “extremely expensive” full seat schooling breeches cost less than $80… And you could only afford one pair.
- Your refer to the holes in your breeches as “ventilation” ports.
- You know the day will soon arrive when the seat of your breeches bust. Most likely at an expensive clinic that you couldn’t afford, and in front of the extremely rich ladies riding the 50k Warmbloods.
- You’ve come to grips with the fact that sleeping outside your horses stall at a show is the only affordable option.
- Your saddle is older than 90% of the people you show against.
- The fee’s to register both you and your horse for either USEF, or USDF, cost more than one of your mortgage payments.
- Your trailer was painted with spray cans…. And it looks nicer than it used to.
- Your only truck is 20 years old, and has bungee cords holding up the gas tank.
- You are ecstatic when your truck and trailer actually make it to the show.
- When you park your trailer on the show grounds, people move their trailers to get out of the ghetto.